Tag Archives: perspective

BECOMING A DEEP REAL AUTHENTIC WOMAN OF GOD Part 8

     [From Part 7] Dig Deep, Release the Past and the People in it, and develop A NEW PERSPECTIVE.

Isaiah 43:16, 18-19 “This is what the Lord says—

    he who made a way through the sea,

    a path through the mighty waters,

“Forget the former things;

    do not dwell on the past.

 See, I am doing a new thing!

    Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

I am making a way in the wilderness

    and streams in the wasteland.”

     Developing a new perspective can be easy to say and hard to do. It takes time, effort, repetition and persistence. 

Jeremiah 29:11-14 (NIV)  “ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.  I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity.  I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.””

     God declares that He knows His plans for us. He plans that we have a hope and a future.  I believe the hope our Abba Father has for us; in part, breaks through and frees us when we see how the things we tell ourselves truly impact how we think about ourselves, others, and the events in our lives.  

     In his book ‘A Better Way to Think: Using Positive Thoughts to Change Your Life,’ H. Norman Wright talks about the effects extreme stress and worry have on our brains and how words we tell ourselves repeatedly can actually short-circuit those effects.  For instance, when we are worried we can repeat over and over “Praise God” or “Purple Fish” or “I can do this;”  any affirmations will work.  Wright also suggests “Don’t spend so much time thinking. Begin experiencing the world without the running commentary in your mind. Don’t take your thoughts as the gospel truth. Think of them like the clouds, drifting across the sky. At times they’re there, and then they’re gone. They have no permanence. Look at each day as a new day, disconnected from the past and future, so you can experience what God has in store for you. Pay attention to your thought life. Are your thoughts drifting, or are you choosing to focus them? Remember, you’re in charge—of your thoughts and actions. Accept the way things are right now, and look for the positive in this moment, rather than assuming positive things are only possible in the future. If your thinking begins moving toward depression, interrupt your thinking process.” 

     We can interrupt our thinking by choosing to WORSHIP AND PRAISE GOD. 

Instead of worrying … worship and praise God. 

Instead of focusing on our fears … worship and praise God. Instead of living in regret of the past … worship and praise God. He is good. He is faithful. He sees us as we truly are, a daughter of the King, that makes us HIS Princess! 

     For times when we struggle to find the words to worship and praise God, His Word gives us what we need. 

Psalm 30:4-5 (NIV)  “Sing the praises of the Lord, you his faithful people; praise his holy name.  For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning”.

John 10:27-29 (NIV)  “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.  I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand.  My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand.”

Romans 8:38-39 (NIV)  “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,  neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Psalm 37:4 (NIV)  “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

     The enemy works very hard to erect barriers in our lives to keep us from connecting fully with God and each other.  He will try to keep us stewing in our fears that have been ingrained in us through our past experiences and lead us to seeing our lives and priorities through a distorted perspective.

Let’s break through these barriers and draw closer to God and each other. 

Let’s ASK GOD FOR STRENGTH TO DIG DEEP AS WE SEEK TO RELEASE THE PAST (AND THOSE IN IT) AND KNOCK ON THE DOOR TO A NEW PERSPECTIVE.   LET’S REJOICE IN WORSHIP & PRAISE TO THE LORD; FOR HE IS FAITHFUL.

#BreakingBarriers#Reconnection

Contact me at soulcarecoach.amy@gmail.com to discuss breaking down barriers or to place an order for my book “Wilderness Journey Living journal”. It’s a guided journal for women that leads you through eight weeks of Taking Steps Toward God through a variety of journaling styles.

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BECOMING A DEEP REAL AUTHENTIC WOMAN OF GOD Part 7

     [From Part 6] The extremes of counting only on God (my interpretation of his leading) or the other end of the spectrum, seeking others for leading, cuts out the balance of seeking God, seeking wise counsel, and then seeking God for further direction. This plan keeps a healthy balance in our relationship with God and others. It breaks down barriers.

     Focusing on the barriers of fear, our past, our perspective, our priorities, and isolation can keep us imprisoned by them. They can seem so heavy and can lead us to feel totally defeated.  Let’s not stay here in this prison cell, let’s break free and break through to the freedom and the relationships God has created us for.  Through preparing for this material, I realized these barriers deal with how we internally process and view the things we experience. The antithesis of this requires a relationship with God.   

     To help us to remember some ways we can break through the barriers and connect with God and others, I have used the acronym D R A W.

     DIG DEEP. Ask God in prayer to help you to pull back the curtain today and every day, so you can see where the devil is lurking and working.  While we will experience fear in our lives, we don’t have to agree with the messages it sends. We don’t have to wallow in it. We don’t have to choose it. And we definitely don’t have to make friends with it. 

     In ‘Fearless-Imagine Your Life Without Fear, Max Lucado states, “Christ-followers contract malaria, bury children & battle addictions & as a result, face fears. It’s not the absence of storms that sets us apart. It’s whom we discover in the storm; an unstirred Christ.”  Whatever we water, grows.  If we water fear, it will grow. If we water our faith, it will grow.  When our faith grows, our fears are depleted of what makes them grow.

 Matthew 7:7-12 (NIV)

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.

 “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone?  Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?  If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!  So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.”

     Earlier I shared with you that I have lived most of my life fearful of many things.  That changed for me several years ago when I was away at one of my ministerial classes and the Holy Spirit stopped me dead in my tracks. I was on a walk and he told me ‘not another step … until you are ready to get out of the boat, and you are not able to return.’  The boat I had to get out of was the boat of Avoidance. Avoidance of fears and hiding from those things that scared me.  It took a few minutes to muster up the courage to take that literal step out of the boat.  It’s not always been easy to stay out of the boat, because stepping out of it meant diving into the waters of the unknown. The chaos, the monsters of the past, and the storms.  I’m so thankful for my Jesus who calms storms and who has already defeated Satan. This truth has given me the strength and courage to keep going.

     What holds us in our fears? We have history with our past.  We have lived years and years with these things we have stored up in our minds like a treasure chest full of things we value.  It’s time to RELEASE THE PAST AND THE PEOPLE IN IT.

Acts 16:26 (NIV)  “Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose.”

Galatians 5:1 (NIV) “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.”

     How do we release the past and the people in it?  There is not a quick ‘fix’ or an easy answer to this question, however, there are some ways we can break through and experience freedom.  

I have realized, with help from Christian counselors, that I don’t have to agree with harsh or mean words spoken to me. 

I can tell myself the truth spoken about me from Scripture.

I can make an intentional decision to forgive those who’ve hurt me in the past, whether it was intentional or accidental. 

     Forgiveness is a process.  It takes months of daily choosing to forgive an offense until it no longer stirs emotion to think about it.  

There are three types of forgiveness.  

  1.  Exoneration.  This is a complete forgiveness.  A reconciliation is possible here.  I have exonerated the guy that caused the accident that took my son’s life.
  2. Forbearance.  Forgiveness is granted but the offense is not forgotten as a safety measure.  I have forgiven family members for ways they hurt me, however I remember them so I don’t get hurt again in the same way.
  3. Release.  This is releasing the person who hurt us and over time being able to pray for them.  This doesn’t mean the offense is/was okay, it just means we are taking them off our hook and leaving judgement for God, the only just judge. I have forgiven and released my grandfather for the abusive way he treated me. I’m not accepting it was okay for him to treat me that way, I’m releasing him to be dealt with by God. 

     From ‘Fervent’ (Priscilla Shirer) “When galvanized with the living truth of God’s Word, fervent prayer is the bucket that can dip down into the reserves of God’s strength and pull up all the resolve you need for releasing other people from what they owe you.”

     Through the cross of Jesus we have the ability to release the past, recognizing it has shaped who we are today.  We can live in the present with God and give him our future.  When we give God the messes of yesterday, today and tomorrow, he can turn those messes into a message that can change the world, or at least, our corner of it.

     In Part 8 (Finally the last entry) Dig Deep, Release the Past and the People in it, and develop A NEW PERSPECTIVE. You will have to check out my next post to know what comes next.

#BreakingBarriers#Reconnection

Contact me at soulcarecoach.amy@gmail.com to discuss breaking down barriers or to place an order for my book “Wilderness Journey Living journal”. It’s a guided journal for women that leads you through eight weeks of Taking Steps Toward God through a variety of journaling styles.

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BECOMING A DEEP REAL AUTHENTIC WOMAN OF GOD Part 4

     [From Part 3]  Through years of healing, prayer, and study, I’ve learned my little girl mind subconsciously developed ways to protect myself by avoiding hard situations and trying to be perfect so as to not do anything ‘deserving of a spankin’. All the while, what was happening was unconsciously agreeing with the words spoken over me. By agreeing with the words, the lies, I made agreements with the enemy of my soul which he was all too happy to hold me to. These agreements or self protective vows were how my wounded mind and heart tried to protect me. What it actually did was keep me in a deep cycle of constant, sometimes subconscious, emotional and spiritual pain. The way out, the way to healing, began with Jesus.

     I feel this is a great point to stop and recap what I’ve shared so far. We are looking at four barriers to communication in Becoming Deep Real Authentic Women of God. Barriers can be spiritual and/or emotional chains that bind us and keep us from being free to be who God has created us to be. 

  • Fears. In looking at where fears come from, seeds are planted, watered, and grow from wounds in our past experiences.
  • Past. Our wounds from the past/our childhood, left open can keep us shackled to fear and unforgiveness, making connections with God and others difficult. The way out, the way to healing, begins with Jesus. 
  • Perspective. 

     Each of us have our own lenses or perspective we see life through. This perspective is tinted by life experiences, personality, DNA, and more. We have all learned through the feelings and beliefs about ourselves that have been stored up and treasured through our lives. This makes up our perspective about ourselves, God, and others.

     A reality for each of us to face is that the enemy/Satan wants us to believe we have nothing to offer God or anyone else. This perspective, or belief, is a lie. When we live out of this perspective, it causes a barrier in our relationships. Our living out of the perspective that we’re insignificant or what we have to say isn’t wanted by anyone, can lead to not sharing with the world the gifts God has given to us for his plan and purpose. I’ve personally lived in this way.

     Most of my adult life has been spent making decisions based on the belief I’m not as important as everyone else. That I don’t have anything to offer others, especially the God of the Universe. My belief that I would fail, and fear if I succeeded, kept me from using my God-given gifts. Thankfully, God has been working gently and kindly to reshape my perspective and beliefs. While I’m far from the masterpiece Abba has created me to be, I’m much closer than I was five years ago. Even three years ago. 

     Instead of us celebrating who we truly are in Christ, the enemy wants us disengaged, lifeless and constantly mourning who we wished we were. He wants nothing more than to see us crippled by self-doubt and drowning in insecurity. We are pushed further away from God and others when we fall into the trap of believing these lies. In a very real sense, we are then locking the door to our hearts from the inside. I have experienced this many times. 

     Growing up with the insecurities I had led me to believe no one would want to be my friend and for sure, no one would want to marry me.  Fortunately I was wrong. I have many friends and my husband and I have been married since 1990. Being an introvert and feeling this way about myself has made it very difficult to open myself up to relationships. This is another example of how our perspective can be a barrier to connection.

     The fears that we have developed through our past experiences have not only given way to how we view our present (our perspective), it also plays a large role in the priorities we set in our lives today.  

In Part 5, we will talk about our priorities as barriers to Becoming Deep Real Authentic Women of God.

#BreakingBarriers#Reconnection

Contact me at soulcarecoach.amy@gmail.com to talk about how your perspective is influencing your life and the decisions you are making.

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Inner Strength…Resilience (Part 2)

Part 2 of 3 Japanese Knotweed.

     My mind wanders from the dahlia (from Part 1) to another plant I am very familiar with. Japanese Knotweed. This ‘weed’ is lacking in the beauty and desirability of the dahlia, it does share characteristics of strength and determination. Knotweed, I’ve realized, is a solid example of resilience.

     My journey with Japanese Knotweed started a few years ago when this pesky plant kept popping up in a flower bed that I had painstakingly arranged with my desired decor and plant life. This determined pest didn’t fit the profile for what I had planned. My husband dug the root out and burned it, only to have it grow back quickly. The first summer I was mildly annoyed at it. By the next summer I was too busy to worry about my flower beds, therefore the persistent plant was allowed to grow as it wanted. Our third spring with our unwanted guest was a new story for me.

     As the new growth of the season began to sprout up out of the ground, I decided to discover what this species of plant life was and eradicate it for good. My iPhone revealed to me what we were dealing with. Japanese Knotweed. Wanting to learn what I was up against, I dove into finding out about this invader. My soft investigation on the  web yielded enough information to know this plant would be a challenge to rid my yard of. Determination drove me to try nonetheless. Advice from the web was mixed. Some said don’t mess with it. Others gave simple detailed instructions as if it were an easy thing to do.

Web details about Japanese Knotweed:

~ It’s considered one of the world’s 100 worst invasive species. Its bamboo-like stems can grow up to 15 feet tall at a rate of up to four inches a day.

~ Live Knotweed is practically immune to burning and it releases chemicals into the soil that can stop other plants from growing.

~ Shoots can grow through weak spots in walls, asphalt, and concrete.

     I set out determined to win this battle. No plant was going to defeat me. I would dig every last root out of the ground. My first attempt seemed like a win, briefly. My husband and I dug up many shoots, laid them on boards to dry out and be burnable. This was a defeating exercise! Each root we dug out revealed more below the surface. Every small win seemed to be a bigger loss. Hours upon hours of digging resulted in more and more shoots coming up out of the ground within 48 hours. I lost sleep. Japanese Knotweed became a topic in most of my conversations and even a blog post or two. I wanted to warn everyone about this extreme invasive plant that was near impossible to eliminate. 

     Feeling defeated and at my wits end, I called an organization that deals with invasive plants. The expert on the other end informed me it’s best to leave it alone or hire a knowledgeable landscaper specially trained to uproot/destroy it. This at a cost of about $100.00 an hour with a time frame of 5-10 years to be completely rid of it and no guarantees it would be entirely gone. Our other option was to personally spend 5-10 years treating the plant leaves each fall with two potent chemicals, at a cost of around $125.00 a year. None of these options seemed doable to me. I lost more sleep. Hiring someone wasn’t an option we could afford. The thought of putting strong chemicals in the ground where our drinking water comes from wasn’t an option I was in favor of either. I decided to concede to the knotweed. It will just grow in the yard, untampered with by me.

     Through the course of battling this formidable opponent, I began to ask God, “What do you want me to learn or take away from this experience? There’s got to be something good in this.”

Look for the conclusion in Part 3.

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