Tag Archives: guilt

Becoming a Deep Real Authentic Woman of God Part 5

BECOMING A DEEP REAL AUTHENTIC WOMAN OF GOD Part 5

     [From Part 4] The fears that we have developed through our past experiences have not only given way to how we view our present (our perspective), it also plays a large role in the priorities we set in our lives today. 

     This leads us to our fourth and final barrier to relationships and becoming a Deep Real Authentic Woman of God. 

Priorities.

     We live in a world of busyness being a priority and something to strive for.  In God’s economy, he’s first, then our spouse and family. Our job and ministry come after that.  He also commands that we take a Sabbath rest from all the things that tax our ability to put him first.  I am not speaking just to you, I need this message as well.  

     This is an area where we see the enemy at work.  Satan strives to keep us busy and overloaded in our lives and our schedules, pushing ourselves beyond our limits. Feeling that we just can’t say ‘no’ to whatever is asked of us.  Not that I want to give the enemy any more air time than I already have, however, I believe this quote from “Fervent” speaks volumes about priorities.  

     “If I were your enemy, I’d make everything seem urgent, as if it’s all yours to handle.  I’d bog down your calendar with so many expectations you couldn’t tell the differences between what’s important and what’s not.  Going and doing, guilty for ever saying no, trying to control it all, but just being controlled by it all instead…  If I could keep you busy enough, you’d be too overwhelmed to even realize how much work you’re actually saving me.” 

     A friend recently shared with me that busy stands for ‘Being Under Satan’s Yoke.” Now that’s eye-opening. The way we keep ourselves bizzy bizzy bizzy, gives a resemblance to the mindset of God’s people as slaves in Egypt.  They just worked all day every day, with no rest, no Sabbath as commanded by God. 

Deuteronomy 5:15  (NIV)
“Remember that you were slaves in Egypt and that the Lord your God brought you out of there with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm. Therefore the Lord your God has commanded you to observe the Sabbath day.”

     The Israelites were forced by the pharaoh’s men to work seven days a week, what’s forcing us to keep up a slave’s pace?

     A full schedule with no rhythm of rest and margin for time with God will leave a daughter of Abba attempting to run on an empty tank, wondering where the day went as she lay her head on the pillow each night.  Where do these habits and routines come from?  Maybe from watching our own moms or grandmas. Maybe from caving into the cultural expectations. Maybe lies we believed from our childhood led to beliefs about what we had to do and be in order to be accepted, loved, and/or belong. Or just maybe, we run ourselves ragged because we have unreasonable expectations for ourselves.  Whatever the reason for our distorted priorities, we can turn them around with our chosen priorities each new day and a reliance on Holy Spirit?

In Part 6 we’ll put it all together and look at ways to tear down these barriers to becoming a Deep Real Authentic Woman of God.

#BreakingBarriers#Reconnection
Contact me at soulcarecoach.amy@gmail.com to discuss new priorities you’d like to put in place in your life or to place an order for my new book “Wilderness Journey Living journal”. It’s a guided journal for women that leads you through eight weeks of Taking Steps Toward God through a variety of journaling styles.

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Strands of Insecurity

When I was a little girl, my mom spent much time teaching me how to use yarn and a crochet hook to make things; such as, blankets, scarves, and pillows. I loved the process of taking a new skein of pretty colored yarn, making it into a ball, and then starting the many hours of crocheting the strands of yarn into something usable and pretty. It was usually a pillow or small blanket that I would make, only to take it apart to create something else, or make the same type of item in another way. My parents didn’t have a lot of money so there wasn’t an endless amount of yarn to work with, so I would just keep ‘recycling’ the same skein of yarn. My mom tried to teach me how to knit; however, I just couldn’t get the first few rows right so I would just crochet. I preferred crocheting to knitting anyway because progress was seen much quicker with crocheting and I have always been about seeing progress in what I do. It’s always fascinated me how I could take a very long strand of yarn and make something so beautiful, so useful, so warm, and comfortable. And how something so simple as a strand of yarn could make something so strong and durable like a blanket, scarf, or pillow.

During my childhood, there were some other strands that were being woven together that created something very strong. It seemed to be warm and comforting, and maybe useful at times; however, that turned out to be a lie just like the things that I believed about myself. The strands of lies that I believed created something, but I wouldn’t call it beautiful like the things that I crocheted out of yarn. The strands of lies created within me an insecurity. The lies falsely advertised that they were correct, that they would keep me safe if I just trusted them, that I couldn’t trust others; even if they claimed to be safe. The garments that these strands of lies created were cloaks of shame and hiding and guilt. This was not something that I knew I was choosing; I was just a little girl, but it; nonetheless, was what I chose to create with the strands that were provided for me.

The garments that are created by lies are anything but beautiful, warm, comforting, useful, or durable. They are a false covering, a false sense of security, a false surrounding, a false …….; you can fill in the rest I am sure. The garment of shame says “I am bad” and it can lead to feelings of inferiority, to destructive behaviors, self-pity, passivity, withdrawal or hiding, living with a drive toward drivenness, codependency, self-loathing, and/or a distorted body image. The garment of guilt says “I did something bad,” and it carries with it feelings of being dirty, ugly, unworthy, and unlovable. The garment of guilt likes to hang around with the garment of shame; they are best buds and enjoy building on each other. The garment of guilt likes to camouflage itself in relationship issues, in personal struggles, in distorted perspectives, and in misplaced motivations. The strands (lies) that are woven together to create these false garments infect the entire garment and the one wearing it. These garments are so different from the beautiful, warm, comfortable, useful items that I created out of yarn; but are they? Both start with a strand. Both are woven together over time. Both are created at the hands of humans. But they are different because one is meant for good and the other is meant for evil.

I know that even what is meant for evil can be turned into good; in the Hands of an Almighty God. Over time, those same garments of shame, guilt, and hiding; when placed into the Hands of God, can be redeemed for acceptance, love, and grace. The lies that I believed as a child; over years, became woven garments of shame, guilt, hiding, etc.; however, I placed these garments in the Hands of my Almighty, Sovereign, Victorious Warrior God and what He’s given me is the most beautiful red velvet ball gown to wear. He’s placed the most magnificent gold; with diamonds princess crown on my head, and He’s orchestrated the most majestic ball in my honor so that He and I can be together for eternity in His majesty. The most fabulous thing about this is that God has had this celebration planned for all of time. He has been pursuing me, just as I was; icky garments and all! Just like it took much time and patience for God to retrain the Israelites after their long season of slavery in Egypt, God has been patiently pulling the strands of lies from my own life and He’s creating me to be the beautiful masterpiece that He planned long before I was conceived in my mother’s womb.

What about you? Have you placed your icky garments into the merciful Hands of God so that He can bestow upon you your beautiful garments and royal crown? When we give Jesus our ashes, He gives us His glorious Beauty; God’s Word says so.

#BeautyForAshes

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